10 Thoughts I Had When I Moved Back to my Home Country

Hello my loved ones!
Today I’m talking about some of the thoughts I have in my head. Not the dirty ones. That’s a story for another time.
I’m talking about the thoughts I have when I realize I live in the land of dead dreams and broken souls.
That land is of course, FINLAND.

There are obviously tons of beautiful and lovely things about Finland I could write about, but that’s not my style. I’m a complainer.

I’ve wanted to write this piece for a long time now and now I finally felt like doing it.
On my last post I complained a little about having problems with motivating myself into doing creative stuff again, and I still suffer from it time to time.
My brain is always occupied by stupid meaningless crap I shouldn’t be worrying about, like some basic drama and career-stuff. Big deal….But now that the days are getting darker, for some reason my mind gets brighter.  So here I am again, with my new article!


As you may know,
I lived in Boston for almost 1,5 years. Before my Boston experience I was working in Mallorca for 9 months. In between I’ve only done shorter stays in Finland, but right now I’m actually LIVING HERE AGAIN. IN MY OWN APARTMENT AND EVERYTHING.
And I hate it.

Here are some of the thoughts my brain has to deal with on a daily basis.
Let’s see if anyone can relate to these problems and thoughts.


1What the hell am I doing here and can I please go now? 
I always feel so stuck when I’m in Finland. I feel like there’s no place for creativity, for breathing or for new ideas. Everything always stays the same and has to be done in the same way it’s been done since the dawn of time. In USA people are more open for new ideas and innovativity. People are being encouraged into believing they can achieve something – and are celebrated when they reach their goals.
Not here tho. We just talk shit. Especially me. It’s a dangerous environment.

2.Why is it so quiet everywhere? WHERE IS EVERYONE!
I got used to the hectic atmosphere of busy touristy Mallorca and the crazy city life in Boston. I LOVED IT! I don’t enjoy peace and quiet 24/7. When I go out I want to see people. I don’t want to be the only one playing Pokemon at midnight. Where are all the cool Pokemon trainers?

3. Why can’t I watch TV Shows from Hulu anymore?
What can i say, Hulu rules.


4. I need sun in my life. I need energy. I need action. I need more happiness. I need love.
All these needs!

5. Everyone hates me. Why they don’t wanna hear about my life abroad??? I hate everyone.
Maybe occasionally i could talk about something else than about myself for a change…. hah, impossible.

6. Maybe this isn’t so bad. Maybe I’ll stay here.
What? Did i actually just say that?
My parents love me too much and I love them I sometimes think I should just stay here and be happy with the family. But….is that enough?


7. They told me in school that it’s important to be international. I am. Still you hire old people who are tired of their lives instead of hiring me. Assholes.

8. My career is not in this country.
The more time I spend in Finland, the more I realize that this is not the country where my future is. And my employers see it too.

9. How the hell am I gonna survive the winter
Problem: I don’t own any winter outfits anymore or that winter mentality
Solution: Alcohol.

10. Let’s buy some vodka.

What about you? How do you survive at home while still longing to live abroad?
What are the thoughts that go through your head? Tell me! Sharing is caring!


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